When word hit last year that John Waters was going to make a children's movie, I was all sorts of excited -- the King of Sleaze branching out into new and impressionable territory! I imagined kid-ified versions of his past films, or just what was in store for a film with the name "Fruitcake." But then there was nothing, and the Waterific news seemed like a distant memory ... until now!

The Hollywood Reporter posts that Parker Posey and Johnny Knoxville have signed on to star in the film. This will be Ms. Posey's first foray into the world of Waters, which is ridiculously long overdue, while Knoxville is following John right out of A Dirty Shame. There's no word on who they'll play, but this is what we know of the story: It focuses on a boy named after his favorite dessert. (ew) "He runs away from home during the holidays after he and his parents are caught shoplifting meat, then meets up with a runaway girl raised by two gay men [My Two Dads!] and searching for her birth mother."

Parker and Johnny could be ma and pop itching for some free meat, or maybe he's one of the gay men and she's the birth mother. Whoever they play, there is absolutely no way I'll miss this movie. Not with Waters and Posey together. I just wish this was the sort of film that would have a set visit. You can definitely expect to hear more from me as the cast fills out, but it will take a little while to get to us -- John plans to film it over a real winter.

With five nominations, it looks like Superbad will be the star of the 2008 MTV Movie Awards, and its three jubilant male leads -- Michael Cera, Jonah Hill, and Christopher Mintz-Plasse -- deserve the kudos. But one major talent behind the whole affair has stayed relatively anonymous while these young up-and-comers bathe in the spotlight: Director Greg Mottola. The erstwhile independent filmmaker, responsible for some of the best installments of Arrested Developed and Undeclared, launched his career a solid decade before the rise of Judd Apatow with a charming little low budget comedy called The Daytrippers. Starring Stanley Tucci, Hope Davis, Liev Schreiber, Parker Posey and a host of other fantastic character actors, the film follows a wildly dysfunctional family over the course of a single day, as Davis, playing a worrisome housewife, tries to track down her unfaithful husband (Tucci).

Mixing warm humanity with pitch-perfect screwball timing, Daytrippers marked the sort of debut that told you a filmmaker had a big career ahead of him. After a modest premiere at the Slamdance Film Festival, it landed at Cannes, barely got a theatrical release and promptly vanished thereafter. Mottola turned to TV work, and slipped out of the film scene for a good ten years. These days, it's no easy task to track down Daytrippers on DVD -- you can nab second-hand copies on Amazon for decent rates, but not a single retail outlet carries it. Aside from the occasionally airings on cable, the movie has vanished.

Upon first hearing Josh Hartnett mention his starring role in the fantasy action flick Bunraku, I had a hard time believing the film was ever going to happen. It's not every day a movie has paper mache puppets, origami, comic books, video games AND German expressionism. Plus, Hartnett was comparing the look of the film to everything from Hitchcock to Michel Gondry. To be honest, the whole thing sounded like a mess. But, I guess it was all sorted out because The Hollywood Reporter announced that Demi Moore has just signed to star in the role of a captive courtesan to an evil warlord.

Guy Moshe (who also wrote the script) will direct the story of a lone drifter (Hartnett) who blows into town with revenge on his mind, but is soon faced with even bigger problems than he started with. Woody Harrelson also signed to play 'The Bartender' (in a bar where everyone knows your name?) and Japanese actor Shun Sugata (Kill Bill) has been cast in the role of 'Uncle'.

Most of us are probably painfully aware of the stress of the holidays when it comes to familial relationships. Films about families tell the one story that practically anyone can relate to. So in the spirit of feeling better about ourselves I've compiled a list of some of the most dysfunctional families in film. Maybe after taking a look at some big-screen dysfunction, we can sit back and take a little solace in that at least none of us have to sit down to Christmas dinner with any of the people on the following list.

1. Spanking the Monkey

Before he was famous on You Tube for his demented freak-out on the set of I Heart Huckabees, David O. Russell was famous for making the unthinkable; a comedy about incest. Monkey stars Alberta Watson as Susan Aibelli; a lonely and depressed mother who develops a sexual relationship with her son after they are left alone together for the summer. Jeremy Davis stars as her son and the subject of this unlikely coming-of-age story. The film might not be for the weak of heart, but it did manage to win an audience award at Sundance in 1994, and was responsible for turning Russell into the megalomaniac we've all come to know and love.

2. Ordinary People

Besides going down in infamy as the film that beat Raging Bull out of a 'Best Picture Oscar', this 1981 drama about a family dealing with the loss of it's 'favored son' was the directorial debut of Robert Redford. Timothy Hutton stars as the younger brother who is readjusting to life after a botched suicide attempt. Donald Sutherland and Mary Tyler Moore also star as the parents to Hutton and Judd Hirsch as the prototypical 'earthy NY Jewish' psychiatrist. So for anyone who watched Mary Tyler Moore as the epitome of 'chirpiness' during the seven year run of her self-titled series, get ready to be blown away, because her performance as a cold and repressed suburban mom is one of the best there is.

If creative media is to be believed, transplants are very risky business -- and we haven't even been hit with the wave of genetic repossession yet! I'm not sure if anything will ever beat Lindsay's evil hand on Angel, but we're about to get a taste of something even more creepy -- Jessica Alba's evil eye. In October, there was a weird, silent trailer for her upcoming horror film, The Eye. (Remake of the Hong Kong horror film, also known as The Eye, but translated literally -- Seeing Ghosts.) Now MySpace is hosting the exclusive full trailer, with voices and all!

Alba plays Sydney Wells, a blind concert violinist who finally gets the gift of sight when she gets some cornea transplants. That is, after she gets over the initial blur. She gets an unnerving surprise party, and then starts to see dead people. But this isn't some Sixth Sense sort of sight -- these dead guys are creepy, and they're not just moping around. People are falling out of closed windows, hovering above the ground, and even popping up in her peephole. This, in turn, makes her a bit crazy, demanding to know where her eyes came from as she runs around, smashes a mirror, and somehow loses the ability to properly select a floor in an elevator. The trailer is alright -- not especially creep-inducing, but necessarily bad either. I think this will be one of those films that we'll have to wait and see. It'll hit theaters February 1, 2008.

Jessica Alba's latest, The Eye, is about a blind woman who has an eye transplant that enables her to see into the supernatural world. It's a remake of twin brothers' Oxide Pang Chung and Danny Pang's 2002 Hong Kong horror film Gin Gwai. The new film was directed by David Moreau and Xavier Palud, with re-shoots (uh-oh) by Patrick Lussier. It was written by Sebastian Gutierrez, who scripted Gothika and Snakes on a Plane (uh-oh again). The trailer is up online over at Yahoo Movies, and you've probably got some questions. Will this one be any better than the average crappy horror flick? Are we talking more The Ring or more The Grudge 2? If Jessica Alba were really blind, could she learn to love a monster like me? Maybe you should take your pretty little eyes over there and check out that trailer, Mogambo!

The trailer feels like more of a long teaser. There is no dialogue, just some pulsing music, and quick flashes telling the story in images. It's nicely done but not mind-blowing. A few moments stood out, like the floating feet and the nice little jump at the end. I also like the bit where she appears to be painfully squeezing fluid out of her eye. It reminded me of trying to put in my contact lenses while hung over. The Eye co-stars Alessandro Nivola (Junebug) and the always delightful Parker Posey. I saw Posey for a half second in the trailer, and no Nivola, but I guess when you've got one of the most beautiful women in the world in your movie, you want to put her front and center. Cinematical visited the set of The Eye back in April, and if you'd like to read a discussion with Miss Alba regarding the film, you can find it here. The Eye is due in theaters on February 1st, 2008.

Before I go any further, I should probably get this off my chest. I never liked Sex in The City; there, I said it. I know there are millions of you out there with plenty of valid reasons as to why it was the greatest show ever -- but those four chicks just got on my nerves. Which is a shame considering how much I like Sarah Jessica Parker -- anyone who starred in Footloose and Square Pegs can't be all bad.

Variety reports that Parker will star in The Late Bloomer's Revolution. Based on Amy Cohen's memoir of the same name, the film will follow a "single woman who, after the death of her mother, develops a bond with her father as they both try to get on with their lives in the dating world." It's a character remarkably similar to Carrie Bradshaw, and the book was described as having a "much deeper masochistic streak than Sex and the City, even if she copes with setbacks like a virulent face rash with as much self-deprecating humor as she can muster."

Revolution will be the feature directorial debut of Amy Sherman-Palladino, creator of The Gilmore Girls and executive producer of the upcoming Parker Posey comedy series, The Return of Jezebel James. All eyes are still on Sex and The City though, and between rumors of fake flashbacks and pregnancies the production is under some serious scrutiny right now. Parker (Sarah, not Posey) seems to be firmly entrenched in the romantic comedy camp, and has also been attached to A Family Affair, about a woman who accidentally has an affair with her future father in law. Now that's someone who sounds like they could use advice from someone like Carrie Bradshaw.

Note: This film can't be reviewed without spoilers right from the get-go, so fair warning.

There are about a billion movies released each year, and even someone like myself, whose business is movies, can't see them all. Some of this year's biggest blockbusters and most talked-about art house films will undoubtedly slip by me. So it's certainly possible that director Zoe Cassavetes hasn't seen the film Before Sunset*, which came out three years ago. What's harder to believe is that none of the actors, crew members, or studio people involved with Broken English saw it either. If they had, surely they would have pulled her aside at some point and whispered in her ear that the ending of her film is, while not an actionable rip-off of Sunset's ending, close enough to make any audience member who has seen both films do a double-take. Let's put it this way -- a friend of mine who saw Broken English with me, and is only a casual movie watcher, actually perked up at the end and said 'Hey, isn't that what happened in that other Paris movie, with Ethan Hawke?" That's how similar the two are.

Putting that aside, the film is a passable -- sometimes more than passable -- romantic comedy about a Manhattanite named Nora, played by Parker Posey, whose fast-approaching collision with age 40 reminds her that she has very little in her life. Nora's job is something of a hospitality person at a fancy hotel -- early on we see her tending to whims of a flirty rock star played by Justin Theroux. Her dating life is a revolving door of disappointments and false starts with weirdos and barely-there guys who pay little attention to her, although on the plus side she does live in Manhattan so she at least gets taken to places like the Film Forum, which gets an extended cameo in the film.We actually get to see the theater's notoriously drink-holder-free armrests caught on film -- if only one of the characters had actually commented on it. And of course it goes without saying that there's a best-friend for Parker's character to lean on -- she's played by The Sopranos' Drea de Matteo, in a pretty straight-forward role.

If you are a Parker Posey fan, which was the last film of hers that you really loved? I just went down the list, and was surprised to see that the last starring role that was really, really great was her Jackie O in The House of Yes. Of course, she's had some great roles since then, but they were all ensemble pieces -- The Anniversary Party, A Mighty Wind and my personal favorite: her neurotic dog-owning Meg Swan in Best in Show. To me, the recent Fay Grim was her big comeback role, but it's one of those films that requires a certain cinematic taste, and was definitely her putting on her old, quirk hat. On the tails of that we're getting Broken English, which might just give her some better mainstream work than her previous side roles in movies like You've Got Mail and Superman Returns.

Rope of Silicon has posted a trailer to English, which pretty much runs through the plot in its short collection of scenes. The movie is about a 30-something Manhattan woman named Nora (Posey) who is single and cynical about love and unhappy at her hotel job. She's also jealous of her friend Audrey's (Drea de Matteo without the goofy Tribbianis or mobsters) "perfect marriage," and has a mom who keeps reminding her that she's single (Gena Rowlands). Nora goes on a series of dates that include Justin Theroux as a mohawk-headed actor and Josh Hamilton -- who played her brother, Marty in Yes -- as a guy her mom fixes her up with. As with any romance, when all hope seems lost, she meets the alluring Julien from France, who energizes her life. She quits her job, heads to Paris and goes out to experience what French men have to offer. It's Posey without the over-acted quirk, which will make her easier to digest for the masses, but still with the same snark that her fans love. And we only have a little less than a month's wait to see it -- it heads into limited release on June 22.

"There will be no peace before Israel is safe within its borders," a captured female terrorist deadpans about halfway through this film -- you almost expect her to pop gum, she says it so casually. A straight-faced spoof of espionage films in particular and serious intentions in general, Fay Grim is also a sequel to 1997's Henry Fool, from writer/director Hal Hartley. Fool followed the adventures of a Queens trio: aspiring writer Simon Grim (James Urbaniak), his half-asleep Martian sister, Fay (Parker Posey), and a drifter named Henry Fool (Thomas Jay Ryan), who walks into the Grims' lives claiming to have authored a multi-volume literary masterpiece called 'Confessions.' When Simon's writing ambitions start to net results in the real world, Henry's dream of being discovered as a some kind of working-class Chaucer falters. He eventually drifts on the next town, another adventure, but leaves Fay with a son. That's where we meet her now, years later, being dragged to a principal's office because the son has been caught with a pornographic viewfinder. "You're grounded, like, forever," she tells him.

The viewfinder, it turns out, was actually sent to the boy by the long-disappeared and presumed-dead Henry, and is itself a ludicrous piece of spycraft and the keystone of a worldwide conspiracy that involves the CIA, the Turkish government, Cuba, Islamic terrorists, the French government and Israel-Palestine. I think Denmark and Sweden were also implicated somehow, but it becomes hard to keep up. The feds, represented hilariously by Jeff Goldblum (he tells one fellow agent, "Carl, go take a walk in the rain") spin a tall tale for the impressionable Fay about how Henry's 'Confessions' were actually a deeply coded text that, if found and read properly, can unlock untold political secrets, but the truth is that they want to draw out Henry himself, believing him to be closely linked to an Osama bin Laden-type figure.In no time at all, Fay is whisked off to Paris on a mission to find Henry. To get herself in spy-mode, she takes to wearing a long coat and lingerie underneath and even assumes a catchy spy alias -- Emily Hopper.

We're finally a month and a few days away from the limited release of Fay Grim, Hal Hartley's sequel to Henry Fool. The first was a mellow, quirky tale about James Urbaniak's strange garbageman Simon Grim, and the rogue Henry Fool who inspires him to become a poet when he hands over a crisp, black and white speckled notebook. Parker Posey played Fay Grim, Simon's sex-crazy sister who ends up marrying Fool. This sequel, which Kim Voynar reviewed during TIFF last year, deals with Fay ten years later -- just a bit amped up.

The film still revolves around Henry and his notebooks, but now he's disappeared. Jeff Goldblum's CIA agent convinces Fay to help him find the notebooks, because they're believed to hold information damaging to US security. IGN has gotten a slew of images from the feature that show how the world of Fooling Grims has changed over the years. There are some shots of Hartley, as well as scenes from the film. We've got Liam Aiken, the same little boy from the original film, showing Simon something on the computer. In another, Saffron Burrows is wielding a gun and looking fairly unhappy. And then there's my personal favorite -- Parker Posey looking like a tough arse-kicker. If you're anxious for some media of the moving variety, I linked to some last month. Go out and see it! Go, go, go!

Little bits for you:

• I'm happy to report that Hal Hartley's Fay Grim is finally getting released this May. The film, which premiered at TIFF, was reviewed by Kim Voynar last September. I was able to see it as well, and the movie was so very worth it. Film Ick and a number of other sites had rumblings of a trailer online, but it is locked. However, assistant editor Kyle Gilman's film reel isn't, and the first 2 minutes are Parker Posey in all her Grim trailer glory. I almost forgot how much I liked the movie until I saw the trailer. It's fun, quirky and has Posey at her strange best. There's even an explosion in there, if you need something less wordy and more flashy.
• The above title is not a typo. This bit is about Noearsbunnies (direct translation of Keinohrhasen), the latest German film from actor/director Til Schweiger. You might remember him from Keira Knightly's King Arthur, when he played Cynric, or perhaps you've seen his last written/produced/direct/star feature, Barfuss. Schweiger will also star in movie, which is a romantic comedy about a womanizer who has to do community service in a kindergarten. His female co-star will be Nora Tschirner, who plays a teacher at the school. While the plot sounds run-of-the-mill, I'm interested in what inspired this title...
• I've got one more trailer to wrap this up -- Girls Rock, a documentary that is headed to Hot Docs this Spring. Forget Hanson and all their bubbly pop annoyingness, this film is about The Rock 'n' Roll Camp for Girls that lets young girls rock out and gain self-esteem in the process. The girls are cute, real and varied. On one level, it looks fun and terribly cute to see young girls composing and performing hard music, on another, it's great to just see real girls doing more than mainstream media would lead us to believe. You can rock out with them in the trailer here, or on their MySpace.

I'm not sure what the more newsworthy piece of information is -- that more people have been added to the cast of The Eye, or that Sarah Michelle Gellar, Asian Thriller Remake Extraordinaire, isn't one of them. In a bit of a twist, this remake is actually pulling together a decent cast, which makes me wonder if this will be more like The Ring, and less like The Grudge. As Scott Weinberg previously reported, Jessica Alba is set to star in the film about a blind woman who has a cornea surgery and begins to see dead people -- leading her to find out what happened to the eye's previous owner.

Variety has now reported that Alessandro Nivola and Parker Posey have signed on to co-star. Nivola had his own stint in The Ring, if you mean Danielle Steel's made-for-television version. However, he's probably more recognizable from flicks like Face/Off, Mansfield Park and Laurel Canyon. Ms. Posey, well, she's had two second-sequel horror stints with Scream 3 and Blade:Trinity, so its nice to see her starting at the beginning, where a movie has a better chance of being good. It's not a bad cast thus far, but I can't help but wonder if it's the right cast. Can you imagine Alba finding out that her eye is possessed? I just can't imagine her emoting this half as well as Posey, who has quirky body movements down to a science.

I know, I know. Today's all about Oscar nominations. But I still want to talk about the amazing day I had at the Moviefone house for Unscripted shootings. First, I get there and Heather Graham and Victor Rasuk have just finished taping an episode (for their movie 'Adrift in Manhattan'), and they came back to the greenroom to get their coats. They were both very cool, really friendly and all. And apparently Heather had asked Victor if he'd slept with some girl he'd mentioned as being a "big influence" on him, and he hadn't answered her, so she was like, "well, obviously the answer to that question is yes."

No sooner had Heather and Victor left, than in come Zooey Deschanel and Chris Klein for their Unscripted shoot, for their movie 'The Good Life.' They roll into the house with their entourage --

Kristin Cavallari, star of the vacuous yet incredibly popular reality show/drama Laguna Beach, is taking a page from Lindsay Lohan's playbook. Lohan had a hit on her hands with Mean Girls, in which she starred with several Saturday Night Live veterans, inluding screenwriter Tina Fey. Cavallari tells MTV News that she will be appearing in Spring Breakdown, with SNL stars Rachel Dratch and Amy Poehler (one of the best Weekend Update hosts in the show's history, and -- surprise -- she was in Mean Girls). Dratch co-wrote the screenplay for the film which will also star Parker Posey and Amber Tamblyn.

According to Cavallari, "It's a comedy about girlfriends that missed out on spring break because they were losers in high school, and now they're older and they go on a college spring break." Cavallari will play one of the "bitchy, mean girls," bringing to light yet another similarity to Lohan's film.

Again, the word vacuous comes to mind, but I hold out some hope because of Dratch and Poehler's involvement. Cavallari may get the young folks into the theater, but these two SNL vets provide the most hope for the film actually being entertaining. Posey has respectable comedy chops as well (check out a little-seen film called Clockwatchers if you don't believe me).

Spring Breakdown will open sometime next year.