Here's my impersonation of a conversation that goes down 294 times a day in video stores' horror sections around the country:

Gorehound #1: "Hey, let's get this: Wrong Turn 2: Dead End!"

Splatfreak #2: "No. I never heard of it. Did that even play in theaters?"

GH: "Um, I don't think so. But is that your basis for quality? If so we could rent ... this."

SF: "Turistas? Dude. Stop."

GH: "OK then. How about An American Haunting or Stay Alive or See No Evil or The Covenant or Blood and C..."

SF: "Stop! Dang, I think my ears are bleeding."

GH: "Heck, all these remakes get theatrical play. Let's do a triple feature of The Hitcher, The Fog and House of W ... Ow! Why'd you hit me?"

SF: "Because you're shattering my world! I was raised to believe that quality horror films get theatrical releases, while only the lamest cack imaginable goes straight to video!"

GH: "Yeah, well. Where'd you first see Dog Soldiers? And Behind the Mask? And May?"

SF: "On DVD."

Ta-da. Point made. Now, let's make one thing clear. If I said to you "Fox is releasing a DVD called Wrong Turn 2: Dead End next month," I'd completely understand if you rolled your eyes, audibly scoffed and muttered something like "life's too short, nerd" before sitting down to watch, I dunno, Meet the Fockers. Well first off that would be very rude. Second, you'd be missing out on a surprisingly entertaining little horror flick! I know, I was shocked too! First came a rather positive review from Fangoria (and they're not an outfit to suffer lame sequels lightly) and then I got a chance to review the flick for FEARnet, plus Jette will be giving it a spin at next month's Fantastic Fest. Yes, that's right: A "direct-to-video horror sequel" is getting a true-blue (theatrical!) world premiere at one of the coolest genre fests in the country. Fox probably had to strike ONE print just for this festival!

Yes, it's a movie made mainly for the old-school splatter fans, and no, it's not some revolutionary piece of genre cinema -- but when a DVD sequel turns out to be more entertaining than 75% of the theatrically-released horror movies, I figure that's worthy of a Fan Rant. So stop back after you've seen the flick, mutant fans, and tell me I'm not nuts and just starved for ONE half-decent horror flick.

And while you're at it, give the original Wrong Turn another shot. It's a basic, solid terror flick.